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Monday, October 16, 2006

YER-eh-nus

Sadly, the post I spent 45 minutes writing about the planet Uranus yesterday disappeared, without a trace after I saved it to draft.
Nonrecoverable. Just like my hair.

In a nutshell here is the most important fact about Uranus.

It was almost named "George".

So after combing and moussing my eyebrows this morning I found this little known scripture in the Bible:

...and in a man's later years, after he hath suffered through ages of folly, I shall impart upon him Wisdom.
The wisdom shall shew forth in the eyebrows, which will begin to grow and sprout in every direction.
Yea verily, north, south, east and west.
His eyebrows shall be as a wild beast, untameable. But feareth and despiseth him not, for this is the sign of Larry Hagman, who despite his despicable behavior in "Dallas" is actually very wise and is my chosen prophet here on earth in spite of liver problems due to alcohol.
Book of Hagman Chapter 2 vs. 3-7.

There you have it.

7 comments:

guitarman said...

Ah, Larry the Prophet. Yes, I've heard of him. I believe he has a new movie coming out "The Prophet of YER-eh-nus and the wisdom of getting older." LOL. I've heard that men don't really lose their hair when they get older. They just grow it in other areas....Hence the eyebrows,nose,ears,and a few other places best not mentioned.

uncle joe said...

Guitarman,
Unknown to you, last night one of your "other" places was in plain sight of everyone.
I will blog about it later...

Aunt Jo said...

Where did you get that post?
Ur-anus? *snicker*

Leslee said...

Oh. Um...wow. Very intersting. Your wife gave me a little preview of your post via our telephone conversation, but wow. I mean, wow. George? And I had no idea there were eyebrows involved. So which version of the bible is the book of Hagman in? I haven't seen it in my KJV or Message. Must be one of those other Ultra-christian bibles.

Saur♥Kraut said...

Oh I love The Book of Hagman. I think it says something in there about stetson hats, too.

Anne said...

I was going to comment on your post but I have gotten sidetracked by your response to "guitarman".

uncle joe said...

Leslee,
The Book of Hagman is actually part of a great tome entitled:
The Big Book of Larrys.