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Sunday, April 20, 2008

When a man was a man.

I've been wondering for a while about mustaches.
Not only do I finally come out of the INFJ closet. I also must confess here that I have the "M" word attached to my upper lip.
Does that make you think I'm a wife beater? The only thing I beat are eggs.
I do beat the wifey in the occasional Scrabble match and often to the remote, but those occasions are few.

I found this interesting website and their Mission Statement:

Bias comes in many forms. And the end of the 1970s marked a significant turn - and began a dark period - of discrimination against mustached Americans.
While until then it was fashionable to wear a mustache, virtually overnight, it became a fad reserved for the likes of law enforcement, steel workers, motor cross drivers, and members of the Village People.
Enter the American Mustache Institute (AMI) - based in St. Louis as the city is home to the world's largest mustache - the St. Louis Arch. AMI is an advocacy organization protecting the rights of, and fighting discrimination against, mustached Americans by promoting the growth, care, and culture of the mustache.
AMI continues to battle negative stereotyping that has accompanied the mustache since those glory years of the 1970s - the peak of mustache acceptance - fighting to create a climate of acceptance, understanding, flavor saving, and upper lip warmth for all mustached Americans alike.

FINALLY! Someone fighting for a worthy cause!

I know the reasons (plural!) that I have a mustache.
(1) My dad has one.
(2) I look like a DOOFUS without one.
(3) Believe it or not I am taken more serious with a mustache. (Every time I"ve shaved it folks have commented that I look ten years younger. I don't want to look ten years younger.)
(4) My dad AND Phil Keaggy have one.
(5) I have no hair on my head. My mustache balances my face out and draws attention to my amazingly SEXY eyes and lips.
(6) My mustache makes me believe I have SEXY eyes and lips.
(7) My mustache catches falling objects thereby saving the planet.
(8) When I want to appear VERY INTELLIGENT, I turn my gaze downward and stroke my mustache. It adds 25 IQ points. Added eyebrow raise and lowering add 5 more points.
(9) In this Politically Correct Driven World the mustache has been oustered, ridiculed and scorned. I say stop being politically correct and let your inner mustache come out. Yes, ladies too!
(10) MY DAD HAS ONE. My Dad was a Marine. Simper Fi.

I submit to you that when you see a man with a mustache (In Oklahoma, anyway) you are seeing a real man. Not afraid to show the world who and what he is.
He will be sound of mind, wise, and intelligent. He will not be afraid to challenge the status quo. He will be tough when he has to be tough and tender when tenderness calls.
He may not have had an easy life, but he will be the REAL DEAL.

Ask your husband to go ahead and grow one. Just for you. Tell him you LOVE rebels. It will be worth it.

UncleJoeoverandout.

ps. Mustache + Mullet = Mo Ron. You'd better Mo Run.

8 comments:

Aunt Jo said...

I loved your 'stache the first time I saw it. I still love it peppered with gray.

I have only seen my dad once without his mustache/beard. We called him Meathead and he immediately grew it back.

1. my dad has one too
2. you don't look like a doofus. your upper lip just disappears.
3. i know i take you more seriously with a mustache. NOT
4. your dad, phil keaggy AND my dad
5. AMEN! ;o)
6.it's the truth you doofus
7. one more reason you are superhero. or should i say supperhero? since it mostly catches food. or souperhero since you strain your soup through it.
8. when i want to appear annoying i stroke your mustache and look at you.
9. i have dainty woman hairs on my upper lip. (don't even say it)
10. Who has the Daddy?

Aaron said...

The American Mustache Institute commends you for your bravery in the face of great mustache discrimination which plagues this nation. Amen brother.

Uncle Joe said...

Ladies and gentleman...
Aaron the second commentor is none other than Aaron Perult: Executive Director of the American Mustache Institute.

I have ARRIVED!!!!
My ship has come in!!!!!!

Jamie Dawn said...

THE Aaron Peruit??!!!
WOWzer!!!!
My hubby has worn a moustache, off and on, for many years. He said it helped him feel manly since he did not have enough facial hair to grow a beard.
Moustached men unite!!
Be proud!
I love my hubby with or without a prickly upper lip.


New subject...
I noticed you and AJ are not on the list for attending Blogstock '08 this July in Nebraska. I was hoping you and Granny Annie would carpool and come to the shindig. I don't know if you are acquainted with Cliff from my blogroll or not, but the event is on his farm over July 4th weekend. Some are coming for the whole weekend, while others are coming for just July 5th which is the big day when all of us will be on the farm for food and good times meeting fellow blog buddies. Me & my family will be there. My parents may come along too. It sure would be grand if you guys were able to come.
Here's the website for Blogstock:
http://morrowcampbell.blogspot.com/
Ralph and Cliff are planning the event. They are both on my blogroll if you are not acquainted with them.

Seeker said...

I salute you and your mustache.

Lavinia Ladyslipper said...

I love this post. Really like your proud stance on the moustache. It does suit some men very well. When I was small I had two uncles who looked like soldiers of old, with their big handle-bar moustaches. I used to gaze at them, entranced.

Yes, they are manly!

Aunt Jo said...

That is a sneaky spammer you have there Joe. I fell for it.

R said...

I saw a woman last night with one. It wasn't pretty.

My Prof. usually has a beard, but for the last handful of months he has had nothing and has shaved. He is a chameleon. He looks absolutely ridiculous in just a mustache. No. Seriously. He has tried it and we both bust out laughing. If he puts the little goatee underneath it he looks rather frightening.